Barney

Do you remember Barney??? My sister was in love with that evil creature. I think she had every single Barney video ever made. I'm pretty sure that my whole family wanted to kill Barney after the first showing of an episode let alone the 20 millionth of the same one. However, it kept Nikki occupied. I even think my youngest sister was into him too. I don't really remember. I hope Taliya escaped that hideous purple creature. Of course, even if she did, she probably found some other hideous creature (we all hate, as adults) to watch.

I've been thinking a lot about Barney lately. However, it's not the purple dinosaur I've been thinking about though. I had a friend in prison named Barney. His name was actually Daniel Barnett but we all called him Barney. Barney was one of 3 people I showered with in prison.

Before your mind goes every which way but right, let me explain. In prison, you shower with no less than 100 people. Most times more. I used to call it the rain room. Most people had the same group of people that they would shower with at the same shower head. We would all share the shower head.

Apart of me thinks it was not only a practical "we share well among ourselves" thing. I think it was a safety thing as well. If anything dropped down, we all had each others backs. We also shared a lot of conversation over the years so "safe" has multiple meanings here. In some way, we felt "safe" around each other. Does that make sense?

Anyway... To this day, when I scrub my beard, I hear Barney's laugh. He used to think it was funny the way I would wash my beard. You had to be there to fully understand why that's funny. That's a weird thing to remember about a person, isn't it?

Barney has to be one of the most amazing people I have ever met in my life. He was extremely good looking. Even the female staff, after being trained and ordered not to, had to take a double look at him. He was one of those people you always saw trying to better his life or other people's lives around him. He took college courses, got involved in hospice programs for other inmates, all kinds of things. He was a person you could talk to about anything. His integrity was off the charts. It always made me wonder what had brought him to that wretched place.

What saddens me about Barney is that (Short of a miracle of God) he will never get out of prison. He had a life sentence. In Pennsylvania, life is just that, life. If there was one person that I would give a second chance it would be him. I would bet on him to make it in society over myself. It's kinda sobering to me that one mistake can take you out of the game forever.

That's how the game is played though. We all have choices to make. I may not like the fact that Barney will never have that chance but truthfully, he chose that. On the other hand, He was soooooo young when he made that choice. Barney is now in his mid to late 30's and has been incarcerated since he was 18 or 19. I wish there was some way to allow the right people to see what I saw. I am convinced that if they saw a shred of what I did it would change their minds and he would walk free.

Regardless, Barney is an inspiration. He drives me to my goal. My goal is to one day build a group home and help change the lives of our youth on a large scale. Until I can financially do that, I will still work with our local youth to help change one life at a time using Barney as fuel. I don't want kids to end up in the same predicament Barney is in now.

What I see in Barney now, I can see in today's youth. The only problem with our youth is just that... They are youths. They don't always make right choices while they are youths. Sometimes the paths they chose lead them so far down the wrong road its hard to see that there is good in them and we think its too late. At that point, we want to lock them up forever.

There is good in them though. If you look hard enough, you can see it. If we work hard enough at loving and caring for each of them, that love that causes us to care will eventually break through. This break through is when we will begin to see the "Barney" manifested in them. I believe it will astonish us to see just how amazing they truly are despite the junk in their lives.

Sadly, there are many Barney's out there. Men and women who are locked up without a second chance. I am a firm believer that legislation in this area should be reformed for them.

Until then... I cry for them. I pray for them.

I love you Barney. I always will. Thank you for all the things you taught me. Thank you for your compassion and love, for helping me to become the man I am today. You are not forgotten.

-Rando